Started from the bottom and now we’re here

One year ago, I wrote my first blog post. I was frustrated with a fibromyalgia flare up (and, ironically have a bad one again). I posted something on facebook about it and had a few people reaching out asking what fibromyalgia actually is. Instead of writing a realllllly long facebook post, I decided to create a quick, free blog to tell people what the f*ck fibromyalgia is.

I was terrified to actually hit “publish” on that first post. I did not consider myself a writer, and was so worried about what people would think and say about it. I was afraid people would think I just did it for sympathy, or that it was full of bullshit.

I was shocked when the opposite happened.

People didn’t ridicule or judge me. It connected me to people I know, and to total strangers who are literally all around the world. That one blog post led me to keep writing. To write about fibromyalgia, the loss of my dad, mental health, and just life in general. It led me to write for a Fibromyalgia website, as well as for Thought Catalog. NEVER in my life did I think I would be doing this. Connecting with people and helping them in this way. I’ve always been an empathetic person, and always wanting to help, but this really took it to a new level.

I thought maybe a handful of people would read my posts. To my disbelief, over 80,000 people have read my writing in the past year.

80,000.

WHAT?! That’s way more than just my mom reading it. It’s totally insane. In the best way possible.

When I started this blog a year ago, it sparked a change in me. A push outside of my comfort zone and a shove toward finding out who I really am. Through writing I have learned to open up to others, and more importantly, to open up to myself. It’s given me a confidence that I never knew I needed.

Lately I’ve been really thinking about how we get one life. That’s it. We don’t get a re-do. We spend so much time and energy stressing about every little thing and being so hard on ourselves. We often find ourselves living a life that we do not fully enjoy. And that made me realize I need to make a change. I need to make myself and the things that make me happy more of a priority. To set boundaries around different parts of my life that are holding me down.

I want to continue making connections with people. To help them through all of the hard parts of life, and be there to celebrate the good. Everyday, so many people are struggling and I want to be a voice in letting them know that it’s okay to not be okay all the time.